MILD CHEDDAR … with llamas

As a graphic artist who’s worked in a range of industries including food packaging, nutrition supplements, and pharmaceuticals, things like this give me flashbacks. I can hear the meeting now…

Random voices in no particular order, probably 5-7 people at the table, including the graphic designer who doesn’t say a thing but knew this would happen and makes I can’t believe this, I told you this would happen eyes at the other designers the whole time.

• “Mild cheddar. With llamas!”
• Awkward silence.
• “Um… Shouldn’t it say, ‘with llama-shaped pasta?’”
• “Why? What do you mean?”
• “How about ‘llama shapes?”
• “It looks like we’re saying there’s llamas in the mac & cheese.”
• “Nobody’s going to think there’s llamas in the mac & cheese!”

• “If spaghetti sauce says ‘with mushrooms’ you bet your ass there’s mushrooms in there.”
• "Llamas are not comparable to mushrooms!"
• “Nobody’s going to think there’s llama in the mac & cheese!”​

• “You know we asked about this on the first round of design drafts.”
• “What if someone *wants* llama in their mac & cheese and is disappointed they’re only getting llama pasta? You know, those people are out there.”
• “Nobody wants llamas in the mac & cheese, either!”
• “We asked you with the first drafts!”
• “When? I don’t remember that!”
• (*copy of first draft appears on table, with editorial comments about whether or not to add pasta or shape or both, initialed and signed*​)

• “I don’t remember that.”
• “Can we make a change?”
• “We’ve already sent it to the printer.”
• “Who approved this?”
• “You all signed off on it last week.”
• “Where’s (art director)?”

• “She was at the printer this morning, doing a press check on this. By now they’ve already printed 50,000 boxes.”
• “This is why we wanted to have this meeting two days ago.”
• “Printers can’t just yank a job off the schedule with hardly any notice.”
• Awkward silence.
• “What’s the worst that can happen?”
• “Someone complains that there’s not any llama in there?”
• “We get a call from PETA?”
• “Some smartass graphic designer sees it and dedicates a blog entry to it?”​​​

I mean, look at that llama. That little llama is nervous. You *know* something's just not right. Don’t worry, little llamas. I see your plight. I'm looking out for you.